Monday, September 15, 2008

A Mighty Wind

(Yes, it was an obvious and easy joke. This is the last time I'll apologize for it.)

For all my local readers--which pretty much means all my readers--this isn't news, but we had one helluva wind storm here in middle Ohio yesterday evening. It was, as I have been told, remnants of Hurricane Ike passing wind across the country like any uncaring septuagenarian. We all felt the force of that wind and we all found it ill.

The lame joke portion of the post now completed, I--like others--will recount my experiences with the storm.

I was outside with Hannah in the mid-afternoon. I pushed her on the backyard swingset for a while, enjoying the neatness and orderly appearance of a freshly-mown yard. The backyard does look vastly improved since the patio is completed, the tired old plant beds have been professionally shaped, mulched, and generally spruced up with new plants and new ideas. AND Lynda worked very hard last weekend to clean up some of the wrecked ground from the patio construction--tilling and turning soil, removing LOTS of rocks, putting down new grass seed. The seedlings are now shooting through the earth after days of diligent watering and what was once crusty dirt is showing a fuzz of future green.

Good times all around.

So, I was enjoying this sight, pushing Hannah on the swingset and generally relaxing. Then I decided to take H. up to the "tower" portion of the swingset. We sat up there and Hannah enjoyed feeling the rougher texture of the wooden planks and attempting to eat leaves. I just enjoyed being outside. True, the wind was blowing strongly, but I didn't think anything of it. The Midwest has always seemed to me to be very windy--compared to the much stiller wind patterns of the deeper South.

Eventually we went back inside and I started thinking about what to make everyone for dinner. I settled on a menu and began chopping potatoes and boiling water for corn. Heck, I even made a sour cream/dill dipping sauce for the chicken tenders that I was baking in the oven. By now it was clear that the strongly whipping wind tossing the trees about outside was more robust than the normal weather pattern. I checked the TV and saw that, sure enough, there was a severe wind advisory warning for the next five hours. Okay, then, strong winds.

The dramatic angle of the trees made me reconsider my nonchalance. I began to fear for the integrity of our roof, the trees, and especially the small trunks of two trees in the backyard--one of which was newly planted. Luckily, both trees were wired to sturdy stakes and bent without breaking. The same could not be said for the taller trees in the yard who were viciously tossed to and fro by extremely strong gusts. I could see limbs down in our yard and neighbors behind us gathering up things past the fence. I decided to put our sun umbrella in the garage and to pull in the flag on the front porch. If the wind pulled them into the air, they would have made pretty damaging spear-like projectiles.

The power conked out for the first time half way through the chicken baking. Residual heat trapped inside the oven and the uniform thinness of the tenders made them perfectly edible once I got the potatoes (previously roasted) on the table with boiled corn on the cob. We ate in the evening twilight coming through the large windows. The power came back on and then off again twenty minutes later. On and then off; on and then off. It was never a long wait in between and we all had plenty of time to get the kids fed and upstairs to shower and bathe.

The only really concerning part of the ordeal for us was a banging noise that I identified as the uppermost gutter on the front of the house. The long nail-like fasteners were already a bit loose and the gusting winds had slowly pulled them further and further away from the eaves of the roof. Consequently, that gutter--which ran along the front face of the house just above three of the four bedrooms--was slapping around with each new gust. During one quick foray outside, I could see that the entirety of the gutter's long middle was loose and the whole trough was only being supported by the downspouts on either end. I was afraid that if either spout lost its grip, the long gutter might swing wildly in the wind and damage the roof or one of the windows or something. But it held together--we were lucky yet again. This morning it sagged above the house like some kind of drunken grin, but it stayed up.

In the end, we kept our power on. Our roof was fine. We had only minor limbs falling in most places. A significant limb broke off of a half-dead tree on the edge of my property beside the garage, but it just hung down without hitting the house in any way. When I got home from work today, I pulled it down easily and sawed it down into manageable pieces with my hand saw. But the tree itself is (and has been for a while) a useless, unattractive half-dead thing that resembles a broken wishbone. This storm damage will finally give me the reason I need to ask my neighbor to wield his chainsaw at it. (No, I'm not likely to use the chainsaw myself.)

The kids were out of school today due to the widespread power outages across the city. Luckily (again!) the daycare was up and running, so Lynda and I went to work as (mostly) normal. After hearing many tales of ripped up roofs and prospects of days without power, I am very thankful for the very minor inconveniences that my family has faced. And I consider that if I hadn't decided in May to cut down the large, dying tree that sat right in front of our house, I might have a very different story to tell today.

Sunday, September 14, 2008

David Foster Wallace: 1962-2008

I complete my CBS post and do a bit of web searching. I'm stunned to find out that David Foster Wallace took his own life a few days ago.

I really admired DFW's writing style--as bizarre and confused as it sometimes was. I borrowed Jack Thunder's copy of Infinite Jest around seven years ago and read it through after several months (probably?) of confusion and perseverance. Lately I've been meaning to reread IJ but I couldn't find a copy of it at Half-Priced Books the last time I looked. I did pick up (what turned out to be) his final work, Oblivion, only to discover that I had read it before--probably a loaner from the library.

However, I am a proud owner of A Supposedly Fun Thing I'll Never Do Again, my favorite collection of DFW essays and magazine pieces. I've read and reread it several times and am very confident that I will do so again many times more.

I ran into DFW and his sort of literary step-twin, David Eggers in the early 2000s. I have a fondness for both of these men, not just because we all share an excellent first name, but because they helped interest me again in the pleasures of reading. I was stepping away from my academic past at OSU and committing myself to life at my current job. I hadn't done much reading that didn't involve academic school work in many years. So, Wallace and Eggers reminded me of the varied world of fiction. 

And what fiction it was. Both of these men spun tails of truth, human observation, surreal prose, and footnotes! They seemed inventive and wildly creative. Along with Mark Z. Danielewski's House of Leaves, I was excited by the possibilities of reading fiction again. 

I am saddened that Wallace won't be writing anymore. He had a unique gift. I'll try to enjoy that gift again when I reread his works.

CBS Fall TV Preview

So, it was a rocky start when I started this post.

But, I'm here to finish up the Fall TV preview posts on the major networks. The last one to go is CBS.

I've already completed NBC,



and Fox.

*****

Monday: CBS Monday is filled with lots of sitcoms. It's kind of like their version of NBC's Must See TV "back in the day." But, I've always sort of thought it was kind of like the Red State's version of Must See TV. I suppose I can blame Everybody Loves Raymond for that, but mostly I can blame my own prejudices for that. I'll give you a bit of lowdown on the shows and you can decide for yourself.

The Big Bang Theory [9/22 @ 8 pm] is in its second season. How can a show featuring two nerdy roommates who pine after the hot girl across the hall appeal to Red Staters? The answer is, most likely, not at all. So, my GOP Must See TV is already looking stupid. Want to guess how valid it will continue to be? Following that show is one of my personal favorites--and most likely the only show on CBS that I watch now that I've slid away from CSI--How I Met Your Mother [9/22 @ 8:30 pm]. I fell in love with this show last summer and caught up with seasons 1 and 2 on Netflix. While I thought Season 3 didn't measure up with the first two years, it was still quite good--especially the over-the-top craziness of Barney Stinson (played by Neal Patrick Harris before he completely won me over with this summer's Dr. Horrible's Sing Along-Blog.) Please watch HIMYM!

After that, CBS provides Two and a Half Men [9/22 @ pm]. While this show may have inherited from Everybody Loves Raymond the mantle of signature sitcom on the network, I don't like the show and have no interest in spending a lot of time discussing it. I do wonder how Charlie Sheen likes performing that very weird grimace smile that is featured on the website graphic. That must hurt don't you think. But in general, my opinion of the show can be summed up in four and a half words: "It's a piece of sh--"

If you don't like Men, you could wait around for a new show called Worst Week [9/22 @ 9:30 pm]. The description of the show--main character magazine editor who is a bumbler around his girlfriend's family will do whatever it takes to please them--sounds like someone at CBS started jotting notes while watching his Netflix copy of Meet the Parents. But, I'm sure it'll be great!

And then there is CSI: Miami [9/22 @ 10 pm]. I'm just surprised that David Caruso hasn't poked himself in the eye from taking the sunglasses off and on while telling jokes.

Tuesday:

On this night, CBS keeps it simple. There are only three, hour-long dramas to keep up with. But I will keep it even simpler than that. I'm only going to focus on one of those shows. NCIS [previously debuted, 8 pm] keeps the focus on Mark Harmon's procedural drama that is two parts JAG and one part CSI. Without a Trace [9/23 @ 10 pm] is now in its fourth, fifth, ??th season. If you simply can't stand to watch yet another minute of missing persons drama on the nightly cable news networks, this missing persons fictional drama might make it all more palatable. But I want to talk about the NEW Tuesday night show, entitled The Mentalist [9/23 @ 9 pm]. This show is probably not nearly as awesome as the name might promise it to be, but it sounds like a pretty awesome name, doesn't it? Can you imagine what this show might have been if it was written by Michael Chabon and presented itself like The Prestige? Unfortunately, a show that incredible would never get made for a primetime slot on CBS Tuesday night. Instead, the show comes off as a modern day knock off of Sherlock Holmes. But all procedural cop shows on TV--and CBS has LOTS of them--feature one or two detectives that have amazing observational skills. I fear the name is the best thing this show has going for it.

Wednesday:

Are you tired of the procedural cop dramas on CBS? Well, neither are they! If you weren't paying attention, it's only the middle of the week and we've already seen CSI: Miami, NCIS, The Mentalist (ooooohh!), and Without a Trace. You might think that is overkill. You might think CBS is in a bit of a rut. Well, you know who else is in a rut? Old people . . . which provides a flimsy segue to The New Adventures of Old Christine [9/24 @ 9:30 pm]. Julia Louis-Dreyfuss has shaken off the Seinfeld Curse and found a successful (Emmy winning!) show on the Tiffany Network. Good for her. Is the show good? Maybe a little . . . but it can't be worse that anything Jason Alexander or Michael Richards tried.

Gary Unmarried [9/24 @ 8:30 pm] wins points for having a catchy title that rolls off the tongue. However, it is describes as follows: "Gary (Jay Mohr) is a recently single contractor with a controlling ex-wife." Uh oh! Single, moderately good looking guy with shrewish ex. That sounds . . . conventional. I hope they have a smart-alecky kid!

Having successfully filled an hour of a prime time schedule without a cop drama, CBS rewards itself with a two hour block featuring Criminal Minds [9/24 @ 9 pm] and CSI: New York.
[9/24 @ 10 pm]

Thursday: 

Speaking of things people don't seem to get tired of . . . Survivor [9/25 @ 8 pm] is in Gabon this cycle. I lost real interest in the show after season two in Australia with Colby and what's her name who won the $1,000,000. You see . . . that's the problem. Nobody remembers who won except for season 1's Richard (and a lot of that is because he walked around naked a lot). Cultural moment . . . OVER!

This season of CSI:TOS [10/9 @ 9 pm] is notable for it being Gil Grissom's (original lead star/now producer and general BMOS(et) William Peterson) final season. And then there is new show Eleventh Hour [10/9 @ 10 pm], where star character "Jacob Hood will stop at nothing to make sure that scientific advances will be used for good and not for evil." THANK YOU Mr. Hood! Finally! Someone who can tell all those destructively objective scientists to stop and THINK about consequences for a change!

Friday:

Ghost Whisperer [already debuted; 8 pm] is still hanging out on Friday night's here and Jennifer Love Hewitt still has a weird overly haired, skeletal look about her. What isn't the same on this night is The Ex List [10/3 @ 9 pm].  The CBS website that I gave you a link to lists a description of the show as: "What if you learned you had already met your soul mate? When a bachelorette-party psychic reveals to Bella Bloom that she has already met the true love of her life, she goes on a quest to find this mystery man from her past. With a limited time to locate him, Bella puts her normal skepticism aside and, with the help of her friends, lists all the males she has dated, befriended or even briefly encountered in her lifetime. It’s an illuminating and sometimes humiliating search, but Bella knows it might be her only chance to find “the one.”" This sounds like a slightly interesting premise that is a combination of HIMYM and My Name is Earl. But those are good shows, so maybe this might be a quality program. Unfortunately, since it is on Friday night at 9 pm, the chance of anyone watching it is pretty slim. Finally, Numb3rs [10/3 @ 10 pm] rounds out the night.

Weekend: CBS Saturday night is news magazines (48 Hours Mysteries) and Crimetime Saturday--which is a fancy way of saying they are going to rerun all those procedural cop dramas that you might have watched Monday through Friday. And then on Sunday (after football) you've got 60 Minutes, The Amazing Race [9/28 @ 8 pm], Cold Case, and The Unit.


So, there you have it. 

All major networks have been covered. I'll find a better way to do it next year, I promise.

Saturday, September 13, 2008

00.+02.+07

(This first part is influenced by my first few pages of reading Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close.

What might cause people/nations/worlds to change their calendric system? Probably a cataclysm of some kind. A date upon which to base all past and future dates. Perhaps we might have done that with the first "Date which will Live in Infamy?" But we didn't. And now we've gone through (at least) one more since then, but we didn't change then either. So, I guess we won't. But if we did, it would make keeping accurate records and descriptions of historical events harder to describe and keep track of. Of course, if you are going through the trouble of setting your entire world view around a single date, then everything else gets skewed and complicated anyway, right? (And yes, some of you might be thinking that this also applies to religious beliefs as well and I won't deny that the logic is the same.

But, yes, another anniversary came and went a few days ago. The day before I almost made a snarky comment about the appropriate colors to wear on that date would be Red, White, Black, and Blue. But I didn't say it out loud and I have come to be glad that I did not. I admit that part of my snarky reaction is based on my biased opinions about the POTUS, but that should not extend to the normal people that have every right to note this date with reverence, honor, and sadness.

Perhaps part of it the overlarge flag that is draped over the building during this Week of Remembrance. At least I don't work on that side of the office anymore, therefore hearing the WHAP, WHAP of the metal grommets and rope that hold the overlarge flag in place. At least my sunlight does not have a patriotic hue as it comes in through the windows on my (non-public) side of the corporate workplace.

But anyway, on That Date, I got to work early in the morning (since it was my week to leave early for the school pickup). The out-of-order traffic light above Polaris Pkwy. should have given me a clue, but I was surprised to discover that power was out in the office That Day. Not many people had yet arrived, but I climbed the stairs to the fourth floor (exercise . . . NOT elevator avoidance) and set my stuff down. I knew I had Page Proofs to review, so I didn't worry about my non-functional computer and gathered up my chapters, my red pen, and my iPod full of podcasts. I sat down on the buildings northwesterly corner and used the morning sunlight to illuminate my tasks. As I went through my chapters, people began arriving around me, but they generally left me alone. As I worked I heard an intercom announcement that the power was projected to return in another hour or so. Workers were authorized to leave the building for coffee and breakfast elsewhere in the meantime.

I finished my work and found a few friends who wanted to walk to the neighboring Starbucks for the morning coffee. We left the building, crossed the parking lot and decided our route would be through the empty parking area of the now-empty music amphitheater. We had to cross the feeder road, walk along a small overpass, and walked down the slight defile to the parking. Unaccustomary as this type of pedestrian activity is to us, it felt a bit odd. Naturally, I chose to make some appropriately purile jokes to Shirtless about Armageddon, Apocalypse, and zombie attack as we walked. (I even picked up a four-foot-long wooden marker stake left over from some construction project as our roving bands only "weapon.")

I was joking of course, but there was a small part of me that mentally connected the power outage to the previous events of That Day. Remember how for a few weeks after Then we looked a bit more carefully when planes flew overhead? So, yeah, a bit of my brain went There and Did That.

In the end, we didn't make it to Starbucks. We met another band of rovers coming toward us from that direction. Their reconnaissance was that Starbucks was powerless as well. Presumably the be-aproned Baristas were told to defend their milk frothers to the death.

So, we turned around and our band of travelers split up. I went back inside and climbed up the stairs to my cubicle in the sky. Others got in their cars and drove to a nearby restaurant for coffee. When I got back in the building I saw that lights were on and so I got upstairs, plugged in my laptop and switched everything one. Probably everyone who was in the building at that time also decided to activate at that time because five minutes after I started everything, the power went out again. This time the blackout only lasted for about ten minutes and then the rest of the workday was normal.

But, this wasn't a normal day. Or at least it had not once been normal. I stopped worrying about the possible dangers hidden in that mornings disruptions and went about my day, but later that night, when I got home and got the kids to bed I switched on the History Channel and saw that they were playing 102 Minutes That Changed America. I normally don't sit down and watch  these things. I have not seen United 93 or World Trade Center. But I sat and watched. And it made me feel regret for the snarky comment almost said the previous day or the zombie jokes that morning. I was reminded of the simple human dramas that took place That Day as well as the confusion and terror that occurred. 

*****

In other less serious news, several of us had our annual eye exams today. It was confirmed that my right eye cataract had significantly worsened during the past year. According to the optometrist, even with prescription correction, I can't get my right eye vision better than 20/200. So, it isn't very good. The doctor had said last year that he would stick with manual adjustments for as long as possible, but things got so bad since last year that he is willing to go right surgery now. And I am fine with that since I pretty much avoid driving at night right now. If it is raining, it is very difficult to distinguish the streetlights from the headlights and everything has a halo. Adding in the reflections from any rain soaked asphalt just makes everything treacherous.

So, I expect the surgery to occur sometime within the next month or so. Of course, I'll fill everyone in as the time draws closer.

*****

Finally, here is a bit of levity, courtesy of Hannah. Thanks for breaking the mood!

Tuesday, September 09, 2008

CBS Fall TV Postponement

Well, my first week into my own personal Fall TV preview has not gone as smoothly as I had wished. I did manage to see the 2nd season premiere of Terminator: The Sarah Connors Chronicles last night and it seems not significantly different than last year's truncated season one. I think what I dislike most about the show (and I do like some things about it) is that is seems to devolve each week into set pieces of mayhem and violence where murderous robots smash up interior decorations, then go outside and smash up cars, and in the end everyone is all scarred up and bloody. Week after week of this type of things is pretty depressing. (But then, everything about the Terminator storyline--destructive future, no hope, rampant chaos--is depressing.)

So, I watched that.

Tonight I was going to watch Fox's new show Fringe. It was going to begin at 8 pm and I did manage to carve out the time to set the VCR programming to catch the episode--or so I thought. But I guess I didn't have time to double check things because I was quite busy most of the day. All of the family had been battling sicknesses and vomiting all weekend and most of us stayed home from work/school/daycare  yesterday to recuperate. So, today I went to work and was promptly called this morning to find out that Hannah was still spitting up. So, I swapped with Lynda at lunchtime and missed most chances to do any real work--though I did do a bit. But soon enough I did have to get Sarah and Grace from school and then I was overseeing four kids (my three plus the next-door-neighbor) and starting dinner plans. And then Lynda got home, but we found out that Sarah had forgotten her math book at school. So, she called our back-door neighbor (who's in Sarah's class) to see if we could borrow the book to complete the homework. Somehow this evolved into S. coming over to DO the aforementioned homework with Sarah and that became also eating dinner with us and pretty soon I had a semi-full-fledged playdate on my hands. (Remember that this is a WEEKnight.) And Lynda was soon to leave to attend the school curriculum night. So, I was AGAIN overseeing four kids after dinner--my three plus the back-door-neighbor. The homework took a long time to complete because Sarah and S. were giggling more than working, but I tried to get Hannah and Grace's baths completed in the meantime. AND Sarah had other homework to do after she was all done with math, and she wanted to show S. her room, and on and on and on.

Finally Order and the Usual Nightly Routine were semi-established. Hannah was asleep, Grace fell asleep, Sarah finished all of her work, Lynda returned, and I could go downstairs to watch the taped premiere of Fringe while drafting the CBS Fall TV preview.

But, wait! The VCR isn't working! Nothing is taping! Disaster! Cursing! Wailing! Misery!! (I'll have to wait until the premiere rebroadcast this Sunday night . . . but it's still a bummer.)

And now I'm tired and my eyes feel scratchy.

Sorry CBS, but you'll have to wait for one more night.